Pea delivers the companion piece to her previous "8 Ways to Annoy a Foreigner" video, this time flipping the script to show foreigners how to drive a Filipina crazy. Framed as pure comedy, the six tactics are built on real cultural friction points in Filipino-foreigner relationships — from the language-switching game to the universal Filipino filler word "kwan" to the impossibility of getting a straight decision out of a Filipina who defaults to "whatever you want."
The Silent Interpreter — secretly learn her local dialect to defeat the language barrier trick
- This is the counter-move to the Filipino habit of switching from English to a local dialect when conversations turn juicy around a foreigner
- Pea's advice: don't bother with Tagalog — learn the local tongue, because that's what she'll actually use with friends
- You don't need fluency; just learn to recognize key words like "bed," "sex," "lover," and "eggplant"
- The critical rule: never reveal that you understand a single word, because the moment you do, you destroy your intelligence-gathering ability permanently
- Instead, when you overhear something worth addressing, tell her "one of your friends told me" but refuse to name which one
- The resulting paranoia — trying to find the "traitor" among her friends — will drive her crazy and make her extra nice to you for months
Mom's the Word — cure her "whatever you want" habit by giving it right back
- Pea describes the common frustration: ask a Filipina what she wants to eat, where to vacation, what to do — the answer is always "whatever you want"
- The counter: refuse to make any decisions yourself and force her to choose everything
- Don't start the car until she decides where to go; at the restaurant, ask her to order for both of you; give her the TV remote
- Pea jokes you should block all local channels first, or she'll end up watching a Tagalog drama about a husband and wife cheating on each other — "I haven't met a Filipina yet that can resist a show like that"
- She compares the remote-scrolling experience to someone returning to the same refrigerator hoping the food will miraculously change
- For the advanced version: apply the same tactic in the bedroom, making her pick all the activities and positions
- The stress of decision-making will have her begging you to take the lead again, hopefully with a new appreciation that "even Captain Picard needs a first mate"
The Decoy Dater — casually pop up a dating site homepage on your phone when she's nearby
- Pea strongly advises body armor and good health insurance before attempting this
- The key: don't open any woman's profile, just the homepage — that's enough to trigger the chain reaction
- Step one: she may throw whatever's handy at you, so be prepared to deflect incoming projectiles
- Step two: she demands to know why you're on a dating site; you claim it was just a random link a friend sent
- Step three: plead the fifth and refuse to cooperate with the investigation
- Pea says the resulting investigation will "make the O.J. Simpson case look like a traffic ticket"
- She'll recruit friends, maids, and possibly an investigative firm to comb through every male profile on the site using the latest face recognition software
- She might attempt to subpoena company records to cross-check against your name and known aliases
- After about four years of conducting "her own version of the Russia Collusion investigation," she'll probably have to admit you were telling the truth
Register Eggs — the counter to the post-marriage bait-and-switch (weight gain + loss of sexual interest)
- Pretend you're losing money in the stock market daily — act panicked, tell her you've lost another 25% of your net worth
- Tell her she'll need to pick up extra hours at the sari-sari store and cut back on spending (since as a foreigner on a tourist visa, you can't work)
- Simultaneously increase your interest in sex to the point that "every time she turns around, you're asking her to turn around"
- For the nuclear option: surround yourself with empty beer bottles and barely move all day
- The combined effect will have her "hammering out some new terms for your relationship"
Fill in the Blank — weaponize the Filipino filler word "kwan" against her
- Pea explains that "kwan" is a universal Filipino filler word used across every dialect, more common than any other word
- It has no real meaning but can mean anything — Filipinos replace nouns, verbs, and even people's names with "kwan," making sentences incomprehensible to non-Filipinos
- Somehow Filipinos understand each other perfectly, but foreigners are left clueless
- The payback: start replacing half the words in your own sentences with "kwan," especially the crucial ones
- Instead of "I'm gonna go to the pub with John," say "I'm gonna go to the kwan with kwan" — then walk out the door
- She'll quickly get tired of the constant guessing game, and it might make her more precise in her own speech
The Double Take — the quick-glance-at-pretty-girls-then-immediately-look-away move
When out in public, spin your head to glance at every cute girl, but immediately look away
When she complains, your defense: "But whenever I saw she was pretty, I turned away — you should be thanking me for my fidelity"
Act surprised and disappointed that she doesn't appreciate your restraint
Demand the same standard from her: every time she passes a window display of dresses, she should immediately look away — insist it's the same thing, even though you know it's not
Every time she buys new clothing, you get to be forgiven for one "momentary indiscretion"
The advanced version: do the same thing with her cute sister — this will permanently free you from any obligation to attend future family functions
Pea closes by noting this is the companion comedy to her previous video, acknowledges viewers whose submissions were used, and says these six tactics are guaranteed to turn a happy home into a battlefield
Bonus segment: Pea shares that movie tickets in the Philippines are incredibly cheap — about 220 pesos (~$4 USD) for a new release at a state-of-the-art theater
- Compares to Switzerland ($16.80), Great Britain ($10), and the US ($8+), all from 2014 pricing
- She recently saw the new Top Gun movie for $4 — "really good, almost as good as the original"
- Only downside: they crank the sound so loud that after two hours of jet engine noise at "realistic volume," she couldn't hear anything for 24 hours
- Recommends bringing earplugs