π
2024-01-05 Β |Β β±οΈ 19:21 Β |Β ποΈ 79.6K views Β |Β π 5.3K likes Β |Β π¬ 1K comments
Pea sits down with two accomplished local women β returning guest Miss Glenda and newcomer Miss Angel, whose family are pioneers in Dumaguete (real estate, the first subdivision, first memorial park, first crematorium, and an international school) β to tackle whether educated, successful, upper-class Filipinas would actually date a foreigner. The conversation covers class dynamics, cheating, age-gap taboos, what actually attracts professional Filipinas, and where to find mature women who aren't hanging out in bars.
Would upper-class, professional Filipinas date foreigners? β
- Pea frames the question: viewers keep asking if only poor, impoverished Filipinas will date foreigners; the Philippines does have a caste system, so what about women from the upper class?
- Angel's answer: absolutely yes β it's about compatibility, not race or nationality; if a foreigner meets a woman at an art exhibit or somewhere they share interests and there's rapport, "it doesn't matter where she came from"
- Angel gives a concrete example: a close friend who is a diplomat, former consul in the US, now a minister in Paris β petite Filipina married to a foreigner; "it greatly contradicts the old clichΓ© that only lowly Filipino women would marry expats"
- Both women emphasize that when foreigners end up with women who treat them like ATMs, it's often because the men targeted the wrong places β they went to resorts with "women parading in bathing suits or barely naked" rather than places where professional women spend time
Why some foreigners end up with the wrong women β
- Angel argues many expats arrive with a "grandiose idea" of what the Philippines will be like
- They've worked hard their whole lives, and "the first person they meet and encounter is the person they settle with" β no vetting, no patience
- Many also "come broken from abroad" and bring their baggage
- Both guests stress the importance of vetting, spending time together in person (not just online), and not rushing into a relationship
Do Filipinas in relationships with foreigners cheat with Filipino men on the side? β
- Pea asks directly β is it true that most Filipinas married to foreigners have a Filipino boy toy?
- Angel: "I think that's happening" β many likely had a Filipino boyfriend or relationship before meeting the foreigner, and when the foreigner/husband is abroad and communication is only through a phone, "it's like a comfort zone for them to cheat with another Filipino man"
- Both women find this tasteless and unethical
- Angel's view: everyone deserves respect regardless of skin color; "you should not be tagged because of the color of your skin"
- Their solution: men need to do intensive research before committing, vet the woman thoroughly, and spend real face-to-face time β video chat is not enough because "they would say anything, they would lie" when not talking face to face
- Glenda adds that real attraction is about feelings: "you just can't sleep with anyone without feelings, without liking or loving that person"
Would these women date a younger or older man? β
- Glenda on dating younger men: she says it's a "very hard question because society does not allow that" β the "Marites culture" (Filipino gossip culture) creates heavy social pressure; an older woman with a younger man is a "big taboo thing" in the Philippines, while an older man with a younger woman is considered normal; but being honest, she says she relates easily to younger people and "would perfectly be fine with that"
- The hypothetical: would they date a 60-year-old foreigner on a meager Social Security pension (about $1,200/month) who's really kind, funny, and cute?
- Glenda: "Of course!" β her number one criterion is kindness; number two, he'd need to accept her four pet dogs and her active lifestyle (gym, Zumba, singing at weddings); a little income and a little house that can fit her dogs would be ideal
- Angel: she has many friends and acquaintances who would be willing to meet anybody; points out that $1,200/month is poverty-level in California (you'd be "lucky to afford a trailer park") but in the Philippines you can have "a decent life... a little house in the prairie"
What actually attracts professional Filipinas β specific answers β
- Angel: "someone who gives a twinkle to my eye and a smile on my lips every day" β someone who makes her happy; Pea emphasizes how simple this qualification is: "you don't have to be the most handsome guy or the most wealthy guy, you just have to make Miss Angel smile every day"
- Glenda: physical fitness is her first-impression requirement; but for something serious, she needs deep conversations over at least a week β the kind where "what time is it? We were talking at 3:00, it's now 10:00 in the evening"; substance and connection, plus comfortable silence ("moments of just being together, you don't have to talk")
- Neither woman listed wealth or social status as their top criteria
Miss Angel's one almost-date with a foreigner β
- A guy from her gym asked if he could buy her a drink; she assumed it was casual since she was sweaty from working out
- He showed up "all dressed up like he had a date" and attempted a little hug
- She pulled back β "that's a foreign culture and I'm Filipina"
- Her warning for foreign men: be careful about directly hugging or kissing Filipinas on approach; the cultures are different in terms of physical boundaries
Where to find mature, quality Filipinas (not in bars) β
- Glenda's advice: Zumba groups β "there are a lot of older women that are available" at Zumba classes
- Angel's advice: it totally depends on the man's hobbies and interests; a decent woman working as a waitress, cook, or server is also perfectly fine β don't limit your search to a certain class
- Angel's broader counsel: before committing, know the country well β travel extensively, meet people from all walks of life, different personalities and sentiments; build "an intimate relationship with the Filipinos" as a people before rushing into a romantic one
- Key quote from Angel: "Most usually a foreigner is always in a rush to be with someone right away... just enjoy our beautiful country. You don't have to be in a relationship β that will always come later on. Don't be in a rush. Just enjoy. Make it happen naturally."