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Why This American Chose The Philippines To Live His Best Life!

πŸ“… 2024-05-17⏱ 19:52
πŸ“… 2024-05-17 Β |Β  ⏱️ 19:52 Β |Β  πŸ‘οΈ 39K views Β |Β  πŸ‘ 3.8K likes Β |Β  πŸ’¬ 721 comments

Pea interviews John, a 67-year-old retired military and civilian worker from Florida, who is on his sixth or seventh trip to the Philippines and actively looking for a wife. The interview covers his approach to meeting women both online and in person, his honest assessment of the challenges older foreign men face, his boundaries around money, and practical advice for other men considering the move. Pea frames the conversation around the idea that age shouldn't stop you from starting a new chapter.

John's background and why the Philippines ​

  • First visited about 20 years ago on a business trip outside Manila
  • Was immediately struck by how friendly, considerate, and kind the people were
  • Now 67, retired for about 8 years from both the US Army and a civilian career
  • Divorced about 10 years and wants to move on with his life
  • Believes the Philippines is a wonderful place to find a potential wife because women tend to be more conservative and traditional than in the West
  • Cost of living is good and there's a lot to see β€” he's been to quite a few places already
  • Looking specifically for a Christian Filipina with similar values and beliefs

His preferences and the children question ​

  • Prefers a woman without children because he loves to travel, and traveling with kids adds challenges
  • Acknowledges the age gap issue honestly β€” knows it can cause problems
  • Wrestles with the children question: understands most Filipinas love families and want kids, but feels it would be "unfair for a young child to have an older person for a dad"
  • When he was younger he loved being active with his kids β€” playing softball, fishing, traveling β€” and worries he couldn't offer that same energy now
  • Says this would need to be an honest conversation with any potential partner

How he meets women: online and in-person approaches ​

  • Started online dating reluctantly β€” felt it was "kind of a cheap way" or a "scaredy-cat way" to meet someone
  • A friend encouraged him to try, and he got a lot of inquiries but immediately spotted many scammers
  • Credits watching vloggers (including Pea) for teaching him red flags to watch for
  • Also meets women organically β€” at malls, markets, walking along the boulevard
  • Just met someone the other day who smiled and waved at him while walking; he got her number
  • His pickup line: "Does this shirt look good on me?" (Pea suggests he also try "Do I smell good?" β€” he hasn't tried that one yet)
  • Doesn't ask for a number unless he feels comfortable and has established she's single and there's some connection
  • Reports about an 80% success rate getting phone numbers in the Philippines
  • Contrasts this with back home where the success rate would be "between zero and 5%" β€” same type of woman, same approach, but in the US "they're going to be calling 911" or accusing you of stalking

His realistic assessment of what foreigners face ​

  • It still takes effort β€” it's not automatic just because you're a foreigner
  • "Maybe balding, maybe a little overweight, maybe short" β€” you still have to make an effort
  • Filipinas are still shy β€” some won't talk to you, they'll run off to friends giggling and covering their mouths
  • In places with fewer foreigners (outlying provinces, lesser-known cities), you'll be a novelty β€” kids will stare, babies will gawk
  • Pushes back on the vlogger narrative: "I don't think it's like all vloggers portray it to be β€” like all puppies and rainbows"
  • Girls here are not "easy" β€” they're just easier to approach because foreigners are something new and interesting to them

The money question ​

  • Acknowledges money is a "very important factor" β€” not just between the couple but in how other people perceive the relationship
  • Doesn't personally judge other foreigner-Filipina couples he sees: "they could be deeply in love or it could be transactional β€” either way it's their business"
  • Describes himself as simple and frugal β€” watches his dollars, pennies, and pesos
  • Has been in relationships where he was asked for money and "usually I say no"
  • When he said no to one woman, she ended the relationship β€” but he figures "maybe it was meant to be"
  • Warns about online dating specifically: women can send convincing stories with hospital receipts asking for financial help
  • His logic: "They were alive before meeting you, so I think they're going to be okay with or without you β€” just hang on to your wallet"

The questions he asks to vet potential partners ​

  • What are her interests, future goals, and what's most important to her?
  • How attached is she to her family? Will she "break away from the family" and join him in building a life together?
  • Says he has a whole list but isn't looking for perfection β€” "I'm not the perfect guy"
  • Just wants compatibility and mutual love β€” could be anyone, young or old, kids or no kids
  • Emphasizes he's not in a hurry and not desperate: "You can almost see guys that reek with desperation β€” I'm not like that"
  • If he gets bored in one place he'll just go to Bohol or Siquijor for a few days

His advice for other men considering the Philippines ​

  • Acclimate to the weather first β€” it's extremely hot, especially during the hottest time of year
  • Learn the culture and learn about the people
  • Don't get married right away
  • Don't expect women to throw themselves at you β€” they won't
  • Be aware of cultural differences, especially around money
  • Don't send money to women online, no matter how convincing the story
  • Come with the attitude of enjoying the scenery, beaches, and beauty of the country first
  • Mentions Palawan and Siquijor as incredible destinations he's visited

Pea's comedic outro ​

  • Pea calls her mom to report on "Project Snag a Foreigner," saying John asked if his shirt looked okay (his pickup line) and invited her to Palawan
  • Her mom perks up hearing he's retired military, but when Pea mentions he's frugal and won't give money away, her mom hangs up
  • "Back to square one"

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