First Trip To The Philippines - Will You Find What You're Looking For?

Pea interviews Bobby, a 55-year-old from British Columbia who just returned from his first trip to the Philippines. Bobby went with no romantic agenda and a compression bag the size of a shoebox, and came back with a phone full of new contacts, a bag full of Ding Dongs, and some hard-earned practical wisdom for first-time visitors.

Bobby's background and why he went ​

• 55 years old, lives in British Columbia, Canada
• Divorced in 2011, hasn't dated anyone since — learned to live alone and values his freedom
• Got interested in the Philippines because of the many Filipinos living and working in Canada, all of whom he found to be "fantastic people"
• Discovered Pea's channel in summer 2024 and joined her Patreon, which he credits as the single most valuable thing he did to prepare — the community gave practical advice on hotels, cash, transportation, and more
• Went with zero agenda: no plan to find a partner, just wanted to backpack and explore

Packing and practical prep ​

• Brought everything in an 8x8x15-inch compression bag — carried on only, no checked luggage
• Brought suntan lotion and a UV water purification pen but didn't need either
• Brought one roll of toilet paper and brought it back unused — all hotels and most restaurants had it despite the bidet-style toilets

Money and costs ​

• Brought four $100 Canadian bills and 15,000 pesos (fifteen 1,000-peso bills) — says he should have brought more
• Recommends having at least 5,000-6,000 pesos on you for a night out
• Total trip cost including flights: a few thousand dollars Canadian
• Flight was about $1,000 CAD round trip, maybe $1,000 in food
• His assessment: food is "super cheap and good," and a conservative two-week vacation could be done for a couple thousand dollars

Phone and SIM card ​

• Bought a SIM card immediately at the airport — cost about $12-13 CAD for two weeks of data
• Complained about the Philippine SIM registration process requiring excessive personal information (birthdate, hometown, etc.) — felt like they were "collecting data" or building a dossier on foreigners
• The Grab app was "essential" — you tap the app, a car shows up in two minutes with a fixed price, no negotiation, and they find you anywhere

The trike price standoff ​

• Getting off a ferry near Siquijor, Bobby flagged a trike and asked for 20 pesos
• Driver agreed, then changed to 50 once Bobby was getting in
• Bobby refused on principle — "not because I didn't want to pay" (it was about 75 cents) but because he didn't want to get ripped off
• The next trike driver had overheard and also wanted 50
• Bobby and his two friends stubbornly walked the couple of miles back to the hotel

Culture shock — what surprised Bobby most ​

• The open sewer smell throughout much of the city — "a sweet, fermented sewer smell" running under the sidewalks that's inescapable in many areas
• A cheap hotel ($25/night, no hot water) where he came down early in the morning and found a pile of people — friends and family of the security guard — sleeping in the lobby
• Filipino men his age approaching him on the street repeatedly calling him "very nice man, very handsome man" — Bobby jokes he hasn't been handsome "since 10,000 cheeseburgers ago" but found it genuinely uplifting

The rock star treatment foreigners get ​

• At the Lapu-Lapu Festival (thousand-plus attendees), an organizer immediately singled Bobby out, got off his chair, and gave him a personal tour — explaining the history of Magellan's death on that spot
• People took pictures with him like he was a celebrity
• Pea's bar (possibly "The Club" in Dumaguete) — Bobby stayed for one drink, 15 minutes total; two days later everyone remembered his name and what he drank
• He got marriage proposals while walking around — customs officials on a ferry tried to set him up with a female colleague who said "Yeah, yeah, marry me"
• Bobby's assessment: the myth that it's hard to meet people in the Philippines is "debunked" — if he'd had an agenda to find someone, "I would have had no problem finding anybody"
• He warns that the attention could give a foreigner "a big head"

Pea asks: is it realistic for a 55-year-old to attract a 26-year-old Filipina? ​

• Bobby acknowledges he got constant attention from young women
• After 45 minutes to an hour of conversation, women would "drop hints that maybe they found the right person"
• He'd tell them he's not the right person — "I'm the wrong guy"
• He's aware that a foreigner gets automatic bonus points just for showing up, as Pea has discussed
• He cautions: you have to ask the right questions about any woman who approaches you, because otherwise "you're going to be in a situation you don't want to be in"

The underage warning ​

• At a giant festival in Dumaguete, a couple of girls approached Bobby who were "clearly underage" — not immediately obvious, but clear enough that he asked
• After some chitchat, they confirmed they were underage — Bobby walked away immediately
• He suspects it could have been a trap
• His take: "Poverty creates desperation which creates any kind of option" — he understands the dynamics but says you have to keep your head on a swivel

Bobby's friend and the bar girls — a cautionary tale ​

• Bobby didn't fully understand the bar girl system at first — their job is to get customers to buy them drinks, working as hostesses to promote bar sales with inflated drink prices
• Bobby just wanted to have drinks and chat with friends, but realized the bill kept climbing as more people joined their group
• His buddy stayed until 3 AM, dropped 18,000 pesos in about an hour and a half on bar girls, took two of them home, and got an STD
• Bobby describes the bar girls as "kind of chunky" — reasoning that if your job is drinking liquor every night, you're not going to be in great shape
• Bobby wouldn't do the same — his priorities are different at his age

Aggressive beggars — what doesn't get talked about ​

• In Lapu-Lapu City near the courthouse, a child literally chased Bobby until he had to turn around and firmly tell the kid to stop
• Adult panhandlers in Dumaguete would ask for specific amounts — "give me a 50"
• Bobby knew that giving to beggars is technically illegal in the Philippines and didn't want to break any laws
• He feels this topic doesn't get enough coverage — most vlogs just say "people are great, nice beaches"

The volcano scare ​

• A volcano went off while Bobby was there, which shocked him
• Pea reassured him via Patreon that volcanic alerts are common and usually not a big deal

Bobby's Patreon endorsement ​

• He credits the community for improving his trip significantly — specific members mentioned: JG, Igata, Robert, Fox
• He emphasizes it's not much money and is "by far and away the most valuable thing" for trip preparation
• The safety angle: because he was posting updates on Patreon, the community would know his whereabouts if anything happened

Will Bobby go back? ​

• Originally planned to rotate destinations every six months (Guatemala, then Europe)
• Now plans to return to the Philippines every year in the spring
• On whether he'd look for a partner next time: "I'll be more open to it" — but he's not actively looking unless he runs into his "soulmate"
• His mom asked when he got back: "How come you're not married yet? What happened?"

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